SEVEN TIPS TO FILL THE RUTS IN YOUR CHILDREN'S MINISTRY

Frowny kids? Stressed-out volunteers? Directional anxiety?

Have we got a solution for you!  These seven things are absolutely guaranteed to transform your children's ministry from grump to up!

Okay, not quite. Like any anything involving children, there is a host of factors involved. And the reality of ministry is that sometimes you can do everything right and still get bad results.

But if you need a little injection of "different" and "happy" in your weekly routine, or you just want to take the edge off some ruts that you're in, these are good things to start with.

1.  Smile. A lot!
One of the first things that vanishes when we're rushing around trying to get things done is our smile. Kids respond to smiles, adults respond to smiles, and even you will respond to your own smile (don't believe me? Look in the mirror and make the silliest grin you can and see if your mood doesn't improve.).

2.  Take the time to hang out with parents.
Politicians affectionately call what they do "grip and grin." Why do they do it? Because the few moments they spend shaking hands and engaging in a few moments of conversation makes a big impression. So too, it pays to connect with the parents. If your church has a foyer where people mingle before and after the service, go visit there. Take advantage of fellowship opportunities with other grown ups.  Make a connection.

3.  Do a funny voice.
Seriously, do it. While you're teaching the lesson, suddenly deepen your voice. Or make it higher. Or strange. Or break out into Minionese.  Kids love the unexpected.

4.  Educate yourself.
I'm not just talking about self-development resources, such as books, magazines, articles, and conferences.  I'm talking about educating yourself in what kids are involved in. In point #3 above, I mentioned speaking "Minionese". If you have no clue what a Minion is, then it's time to get on Google (or ask the kids!).  I remember a little girl coming in with a lunch box featuring the Power Puff Girls. I asked her what her favorite Girl was: Blossom, Bubbles, or Buttercup? Her eyes grew wide and she looked up at her mom and said, "He knows who they are!" Even just knowing the name of someone on the child's t-shirt will set you apart from most of the grown-ups.

5. Turn distractions to opportunities.
One of the kids brought an action figure to church. As he played with it during the lesson, it became more and more of a distraction. I could have confiscated the figure and warned him never ever to bring it again or else. Instead, I asked if I could borrow it to help teach the lesson. The boy hesitated for a second, then handed over the toy. I incorporated it into the lesson and the kids seemed to be paying more attention (maybe to see if I would keep it). But I learned that sometimes, distractions can be springboards to better opportunities. When the little girl wants to sing "Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star" in worship time, it's a great opening to talk about the Creator of the stars. Restless older kids can be transformed into helpers. Tune in to the vibe of the kids and see if there might be ways to channel their distractions into opportunities for greater ministry.

6.  Always, always, always lift up the team.
Whenever you have opportunity, encourage your volunteers. Compliment them, thank them, pray for them. And if you don't have opportunities to do this, then make the opportunity. No matter what your level of leadership in your children's department, you don't do it alone. Consistent affirmation of volunteers translates into joyful energy in the overall ministry.

7.  Take your children's service seriously.
 Don't ever justify a half-way effort by saying, "It's just for kids." Plan, prepare, pray over each and every Sunday or mid-week service. It doesn't mean you can't be flexible, but it does mean that children's ministry deserves the same quality and attention to detail that the adult service does. Kids are important, so it's important to treat them that way.

What things do you do to add a little fun, energy, and positive vibe into your children's ministry? Please share in the comments below.

THINKING THROUGH MY KEYBOARD: SCOTUS & SAME-SEX MARRIAGE (breaking news)

June 26, 2015

The Supreme Court has struck down all laws banning gay marriage.  The President has made a brief statement. The analysis has begun, but if the mainstream networks are any indication, there is much rejoicing over this landmark ruling.

So here I am, thinking through my keyboard again, and wondering, "What's next?"  Before I get to my random thoughts, just a couple of disclaimers:

• These thoughts are random, and raw, and unrefined. They are initial thoughts as they come to my mind. I'm sure some in-depth analysis will follow later, so please be gentle, especially if you disagree with me.
• These thoughts are mine and mine alone and do not necessarily represent those of my church, its leadership, its members, or those of my friends, or neighbors, or associates. As always, if pregnant or nursing, do not take...ooops, sorry, got carried away with the disclaimers.

Here we go

1. The Supreme Court is not Lord, Jesus is Lord.

2. What will change for the church?  Nothing. We will still meet, we will still pray, we will still study God's Word, we will still tell others about Jesus. This has been true of the church throughout history, regardless of the political environment in which she has lived.

3. We are still commanded to love our neighbor. I know we haven't always been good at that. I think one of the takeaways of the SCOTUS decision is that the church will have some serious discussions on how to love our neighbor in word and deed, while not rejecting our Biblical convictions. The critics say we can't love the members of the LGBT community without surrendering those convictions. I think it would be cool to lovingly prove them wrong.

4. I still can't find an example or commendation of same-sex marriage in the Bible. There's a ton of stuff about traditional marriage, but nothing on same-sex marriage.  Just pointing it out, folks.

5. I'm not a slippery-slope, "the sky is falling" kind of person. I rejoice in being a Christian in America, where I still have the right to believe and practice my religion the way I choose. That being established, is there anyone out there who does not think this ruling will have both subtle and profound political and social implications on "religious freedom" in the future?

I know some of my friends and readers may disagree. That's fine. Keep the disclaimers in mind as you comment.  And remember, disrespect, foul language, overt hostility, and so on will likely result in a deletion of your comment. I love smart people who disagree with me, but I've had my fill of the spew of cranky critics.

THINKING THRU MY KEYBOARD: THOUGHTS ON THE DUGGARS

You've no doubt heard the story of Josh Duggar from 19 Kids and Counting, how at 14, he inappropriately touched his younger sisters and how his parents dealt with it in house, not notifying the authorities for 16 months (and after the statute of limitations had expired). And now that a magazine has obtained previously sealed records and exposed it for all the world to see, there are cries for 19 Kids and Counting to be cancelled. At post time, TLC has already temporarily pulled the show from its lineup.

To think through this, let's agree on a couple of basics:

• Child abuse is never okay. It's never justifiable. It is wrong.
• The parents should have reported it immediately.

While the overwhelming majority of reasonable people will agree on the root-level basics, the water gets a little murkier when we get into the details. Sadly, it seems, anybody suggesting some alternate viewpoints on the murkier details is liable to be flamed themselves. I'm going to trust that my friends, colleagues, and those who know me will understand that I'm stimulating discussion, not justifying abhorrent behavior.

• At 14, Josh Duggar touched his sisters inappropriately. He did so on three occasions. As we already established, that was wrong. But there has been no indication that he has ever done it again. In fact, there is no indication that it was ever an issue in the Duggar household past that time. So is it fair to call the 14 year old boy an "evil monster" or "horrible predator" and demand that he fully disclose and carry that label with him for the rest of his life?
   
• The parents were negligent in not reporting this to the authorities. Yes, I agree. But being familiar with Child Protective Services (or whatever it is called in your locality), I can understand their hesitation to let the state step in. This would take a whole series of blogs (and I'm still collecting some data), but CPS is not always just and fair in their actions. And sometimes, Christian families get hit the hardest. Please don't shoot me and start demanding my evidence for that yet (this is a work in progress!), but it's not hard to imagine Josh in jail, the parents prosecuted, and the kids scattered to foster care by a crusading case worker (and in a late breaking development, a 9-1-1 call has surfaced from a social worker who was allegedly denied access to a Duggar child. Social Services will not comment, but why a visit now?)
   
• What is an appropriate punishment for the Duggars? After over a decade, comments have suggested anything from imprisonment to castration for Josh, prison for the parents, and forced restitution to the victims. There is outrage that they "got away with it" and therefore, there needs to be punishment. Which leads us to the next thought....
   
• This is a theological point, for Christians who believe the Bible is the Word of God: does Jesus love Josh Duggar? Is there no grace or forgiveness for the likes of him? Or did he commit an unpardonable sin, for which he will forever be damned to hell? Is there no healing for the girls or are they required to go through the rest of their lives as "victims," as if their forgiveness of their brother and their moving on with their lives is a bad thing?
   
• A lot of people hate the Duggars. But something I noticed is that most people who hate the Duggars, hated the Duggars before this scandal was revealed. Like the Duck Dynasty family, the Duggars have been blasted for their Biblical worldview, their social/political views, and their lifestyle choices.  And I think this is telling: reading the comments, there is almost an "Ah hah! Gotcha!" glee that has nothing to do with child abuse. A dear friend of mine inadvertently made this point when she said that members of the Christian right would not hesitate condemning this if it was somebody we already hated. Yes, that's right. And with this scandal, haters of the Duggars jumped all over it.
  To be fair, some researchers have serious and well-thought out Biblical disagreements with the Duggars' particular brand of Christianity. I respect that. But often, the critiques of the Duggars start with statements like this: "Fundy Christians with lots of kids...that's bad." "Fundy Christians who denounce liberal ideas...that's bad." "Fundy Christians who are  uneducated hicks from Arkansas, no less! That's bad."  Haven't our liberal/progressive friends taught us that referring to "those kind of people" is the worst form of stereotype? Criticizing 19 Kids and Counting for a variety of reasons isn't new, we just need to be honest as we comment.

Let me state again: child abuse is reprehensible. And failing to report abuse is wrong. But there are answers we still don't have and questions that need to be asked. And like any controversial issue, we must often examine our own biases, our own values, and our own world view before trying to work through a very sad, very tragic, and a very explosive situation.


And once again, let me remind those who comment that name calling, foul language, and excessive ad hominem arguments are not allowed. I love smart people who disagree with me, and civility, sound reasoning, passion, and maybe a touch of humor are preferred.

WHY I BELIEVE IN TRADITIONAL MARRIAGE

I think weddings are wonderful! I've lost count of the number of weddings I've officiated or attended, but safe to say, weddings are among the most joyous of human passages.

I believe in traditional marriage, but I had never really thought through what that means from a Bible point of view. So I looked up various combinations of husband, wife, bride, bridegroom, man and woman, marry, and marriage to see what I could learn.  What I found took 40 plus pages to print. At first, I thought I'd be a smart-alec and just print the list, but you would probably tune out at about the 25th or 26th verse (plus why should I cheat you out of the fun of looking them up yourself?)  So I picked a few and categorized them.

So with much joy (and in celebration next month of 33 years of marriage!), I present "Why I Believe in Traditional Marriage."

1. Viva la difference:

• Creation: It all started in the beginning: "So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them." (Genesis 1:27)
• Compatibility: In the zoom lens account in Genesis 2, we're given the details of this creation: "And the Lord God said, "It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him." (2:18). After Adam names the animals, the account states, "But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him." What kind of companion, what kind of helper was compatible with Adam? The answer came after history's first surgical procedure: "And the Lord caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the Lord God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man." (verses 21-22).  In verse 23, Adam responds by saying, "This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called Woman, for she was taken out of man." I've been told by a few Hebrew scholars that Adams' reaction was one of enthusiasm. This was it!
• Commentary: In bringing the Woman to the Man, God offers this commentary: "Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be  joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh." (verse 24). Jesus reaffirmed this pattern in Matthew 19:5, while the apostle Paul reaffirmed it in Ephesians 5:31. If it's in the Old Testament, if it's in a New Testament letter, and if it's spoken by Jesus Himself, it must be a valid commentary!

2.  Getting to know you

• The act: Almost immediately, we read that "Adam knew Eve his wife, and she conceived...." (Genesis 4:4). As most students of the Scripture are aware of, the word "know" means "have sexual relations with." This is not surprising, since one of the reasons for marriage is reproduction: "Then God blessed them, and God said to them, 'Be fruitful and multiply..."(Genesis 1:28). Notice that reproduction is one of the reasons, not the only reason or even necessarily the main reason for sex. But nobody would argue that it's irrelevant, because without it, the human race would have ended with Adam and Eve!
• The fact: Not to get too far into Biology 101 (or worse, the dreaded "birds and the bees" talk!), but the Man and the Woman are uniquely equipped for the sexual act. And if we were to get into the conversation about reproduction, it is a biological fact that a man's sperm and a woman's egg are required to create a new life. So we see the constant reference in Scripture: "he knew his wife and she conceived."  "He knew his wife and she conceived." "He knew his wife and she conceived."
  God invented sex and He intended for the Man and Woman to enjoy it, and, through it, keep producing the human race. What a great command to keep!

3.  Famous examples

• Ruth and Boaz (the line of which produced the Messiah!)
• Song of Solomon--yeah, I know, the man Solomon blew it and later had a bunch of wives and porcupines, but this erotic romance ballad is a tribute to the love of a man and a woman (and has also served as an allegory of the relationship between Israel and God and later, Christ and the Church).
• Zechariah and Elizabeth, the parents of John the Baptizer, faithfully married for years without a child, until one day, Zechariah enters the Temple....
• Mary and Joseph
• The apostles. It seems that many of the apostles had wives. Reference is made to Peter's mother-in-law (Mark 1:30) and 1 Corinthians 9:5 alludes to the right of Paul to travel with a wife, "as do also the other apostles."

4.  Let me illustrate

• Marriage is used to describe the union between Israel and God. There are a few examples in the Old Testament, both negative and positive, but one of my favorites is in Isaiah 62, which describes the restoration of Israel. In verse 5, we read, "For as a young man marries a virgin, so shall your sons marry you; and as the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall your God rejoice over you."
• Marriage is used to describe the union between the Church and Christ. After a description of the relationship of husbands and wives in Ephesians 5, Paul concludes by saying, "This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church." (verse 32).
• Marriage is used to describe the descent of the New Jerusalem. Regardless of your eschatological leanings, this is a beautiful picture: "Then I, John, saw the holy city, New Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband." (Revelation 21:2)It's no wonder the bride's arrival at a wedding is accompanied by such pomp and majesty! Every wedding is a royal wedding!

As always, I welcome your comments, but please be respectful. Rudeness, name-calling, foul language, and so on will cause your comment to be removed.

EVERYTHING YOU KNOW IS WRONG (part 1)

It was parody song genius Weird Al Yankovich who said it best:

"All you need to understand is everything you know is wrong."

I've always been one to stand for his beliefs while respecting other opinions. I honestly do not mind if someone challenges my philosophy, because a) the truth has nothing to fear and b) I might just learn something I do not know, thus giving me the opportunity to adjust my beliefs and be the better for it.  Mostly, I could hold to my views because I knew there were like-minded people who also held the same views.

But there is a phenomenon sweeping through American Christianity that has more in common with Weird Al's song than my own stand on the truth. For lack of a better term, it's the "Everything You Know Is Wrong Syndrome." And what is surprising is its source. We as Bible-believing Christians expect our beliefs to be put down by the atheist, the skeptic, or the far-left theological/social liberal, but many of today's contrary voices are coming from within the evangelical culture itself. Otherwise good, knowledgeable, legitimate proponents of conservative Christianity are taking up positions contrary to what is often believed within those circles.

"OH, come on, Timotheous!" you may say. "There have always been various views on, say, the rapture. What makes your view right and all the others wrong?"

That's a very good question.  And if those who want to discuss the rapture, whether it's pre-trib, mid-trib, post-trib or even if there is a trib or if everything is post-millennial, want to sit down with their Bibles and notes and discuss it, I'm all for it. Over the years, I have enjoyed, yeah and verily thrived, on such dialogues. In the end, I never changed my esteemed colleagues' views, nor did they change mine. But we both gained a greater understanding and appreciation of the other's position.

But within the "Everything You Know is Wrong Syndrome," the rapture debate goes something like this: "The pre-trib rapture is a late invention of the church and not a single reputable Bible scholar holds to it."  In other words, you may be in one of those churches where you were taught that there was a pre-trib rapture, but...everything you know is wrong!" End of discussion, debate, dialogue, examination, and so on.

Another example is origins. For some time, it was pretty much a given that evangelical Christians believed in the Genesis account of creation as opposed to evolution. Even those who adopted "accommodation" views (gap theory, day-age theory, and so on) were still convinced that it was God, not random chance, that ultimately brought the universe into existence. But lately, the buzz is that reading an actual week-long creation into the first chapter of the Bible is actually inconsistent with what the Bible really says. Genesis 1 and 2 is simply a metaphorical story that really has nothing to do with origins. You may believe that God created the world in six days, but...everything you know is wrong! While we're used to the secular scientific community and media saying that to evangelicals, it's a little disheartening to hear evangelicals saying it to other evangelicals.

Theological issues, moral issues, and even practical issues are all being summarily dismissed under the syndrome. For example, if you are a pastor, you may think that part of your calling is to bring a sermon. But, according to some very good people I admire and respect,...everything you know is wrong! The sermon is irrelevant, outmoded, and dead (open mic Q & A, anyone?).

So why is there this growing shift among church people to revise long held stands? I think in the case of the sermon, it's an honest and sincere attempt to help equip God's people more effectively. I don't think eliminating the sermon is the way to do it, but at least we can agree on the need and the goal. We can discuss the matter at length, but if the attitude is "everything you know is wrong," then the dialogue ceases.

In some instances, particularly with moral issues, the world has been successful with brow-beating Christians with labels such as "ignorant," "narrow-minded," and even "bigoted."  So who really wants to be stuck with those labels? I want my worldly friends to say, "Yeah, he's a Christian, but he's so open-minded and tolerant."  I want to sit with the cool kids, so I'm going to adopt their point-of-view, even if it means cutting down my fellow believers.

There are other reasons for the "Everything You Know is Wrong Syndrome."  Sadly, some Christians are lazy and uninformed (yeah, that's harsh) and so they don't know enough about their own belief systems to take a stand.  I think other evangelicals are just tired of fighting. I think in this case, the critics are right: we've sometimes fought the wrong battles in the wrong way. In our quest to hate the sin and love the sinner, we've ended up being against everything and not figuring out just what it means to love.. We've come up with pat answers to hard questions and left some hurt people in our wake. And when those who struggle with sin, wrestle with doubt, or suffer with issues leave the church, we react in surprise.  So in our quest to not hurt anybody or not offend anybody or not diminish anybody, we allow ourselves a way out and end up abandoning the views we've long held.

There's got to be another way. I'm going to periodically address some of these issues, not as an "expert," but as a fellow traveler.  But my motivation is a simple one: can someone maintain an evangelical, Bible-believing Christian faith and still engage the issues which so many categorize as "everything you know is wrong?" I'm going to try. And I may end up ticking everyone off. But if I can get people talking again, maybe we can figure some of this out together.

I have a list of items, and I would like to hear your suggestions as well, plus any comments as we go along. But as always, please remember to keep your comments respectful and clean, or else I will exercise the power of the delete button!

YEAH...I'M A WRITER

You may not know this, but I'm a writer.  Of course, that may be obvious, since I'm writing this blog. But I've written many other things, published things, and even got paid, which, I guess, makes me a professional.

But up until this year, I've never felt comfortable calling myself a writer. I've said that I like writing, but writing and being a writer imply two different things. I don't know why, they just do. There is no pressure in writing, because a lot of people do it.  It's a pastime, a hobby, a diversion. But to be a writer, the stakes go up. For instance, many of you are now looking at this post to find every grammatical, spelling, and punctuation error in order to make judgments on my abilities. "He split the infinitive and he calls himself a writer?"

When you identify yourself as a writer, people want to know two things: what have you written and what are you writing? As far as the first question goes:

• Besides a semi-regular blog which has been highlighted on web aggregate sites and ministry networks, most of my stuff has been unpublished short stories, plot lines for television shows, skits and plays.
• Two collections of original, serialized super hero stories (kind of like Marvel and DC, without pictures).  I still have them (The O'Neill Factor Serials and The World of Galactic G) and if a major publisher wants to take the characters and basic plots off my hands, give me a call.
• An almost finished novel that is trapped on the floppies from a dedicated word processor. Sadly, the processor is obsolete and its proprietary software is not readable by modern computers, so I cannot retrieve the masterpiece (and the fact that some of you don't know what a "floppy" is pains me).
• In high school, my friend and I wrote a short story that was to be the foundation of gospel publishing empire. A friend who owned a printing press gave us a deal on 100 copies. We gave them away and...that was the end of that.
• A critical thinking workbook for the college where I was an instructor. I got paid for this, but sadly, the cover designers spelled "college" as "collage," which makes me cringe to this day.

So what am I writing now? A novel. I've let a a few people in on the plot, mostly to get their expert advice in their fields.  They will get a free copy of the book.  I'll even autograph it. But I'm not too open to share at this point because it is a work in progress. The basic plot is the same, but its execution has shifted gears several times since I started writing it. I have no prospects for publishers. I have no extra money for independent publishing. I don't know when I will finish and I don't know when you'll be able to pick it up from Amazon or Barnes and Noble.

I've been working on this novel for several years. But up until now, writing has been a diversion, a hobby, a pastime. But now it's different. Things have changed.

Now...I'm a writer.

.

MAKING A LIST (BLOG 2015)

Let's see...decorations put away, check. 

Desk organized for maximum efficiency, ummm...in progress.

List of resolutions for 2015, started (paper on clipboard with heading "List of resolutions for 2015".  Rest of page is blank).

Blogging subjects for new year, in progress. Let's see, what am I thinking so far for 2015 posts:

• Encouraging and instructional posts related to ministry in general and children's ministry in particular.
• Bible related mini-thoughts (positive)
• Bible related deeper subjects and controversies (gasp)
• Thoughts on the "everything you thought you knew was wrong" trend
• Trivia, commentary, and observations from pop culture and current events
• Glimpses into my life and travels
• Maybe subjects suggested by blog readers.  I love looking stuff up that I don't know, just for the fun of it.

Yeah, some of what I usually do, mixed in with stuff from which I usually shy away.  Might make for a good blog.  Check.

Write blog post about future blog posts.

Check.

Oh...Happy New Year!

BE A SCROOGE AND GRINCH!

What do Ebenezer Scrooge and the Grinch have in common?

They are shining examples of the Christmas spirit!  No, seriously, they are!

Don't believe me?  Read the books:

"It was always said of him (Scrooge) that he knew how to keep Christmas well, if any man alive possessed the knowledge." (A Christmas Carol). I can't imagine a more sterling reputation.

In How the Grinch Stole Christmas, it is implied that the Grinch is an honored guest at the Who Feast on Christmas.  What a truly festive figure in the annals of Whoville.

Of course, the Grinch and Mr. Scrooge have something else in common:  they are two characters who

have been defined by their sin.

Sadly, there are many believers today who are in the same situation. They or others around them define themselves in terms related to their former lives.  But listen to 1 Corinthians 6:9-11:

⁹ Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived. Neither fornicators, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor homosexuals, nor sodomites, ¹⁰ nor thieves, nor covetous, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor extortioners will inherit the kingdom of God. ¹¹ And such were some of you. But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God.

Pay close attention to verse 11.  After listing all these manifestations of unrighteousness, the apostle says, "And such WERE some of you."  In other words, all these bad things that used to define you are in the past. If you have trusted Jesus as your Lord and Savior, you have a new identity. You are a Christian, a believer, a child of God.  You have a brand new life, so why be identified with what you were before?

Of course, this doesn't mean we will never sin again. Nor does it mean that we get to skip all of the natural, societal, or legal consequences of our actions. Nor does it mean that we should put ourselves in the same situations that would lead us to commit the same sins.  If you were an embezzler before you got saved, you may still need to answer for your crimes. And the church board will not let you help count the offering.

But with those caveats firmly in mind, I would encourage you to quit defining yourself in terms of your former life. It may take work and discipline--energized by the Holy Spirit, of course!--but you can be and act like the new person you are, to the point that people will see it. 

Okay, Grinch and Scrooge: what are the last few lines in your book?

WHY SHOULD YOU GO TO A CONFERENCE?

Over the years, I have read many articles about revitalizing your ministry.  And among the principles listed is this one sage piece of advice: attend conferences.

I wholeheartedly affirm this.  If you have an opportunity to attend a local children's ministry conference, by all means go.  If you have an opportunity to attend a larger conference outside your area, do it.  And if you have the chance to go to one of the humongous national conferences (like the Children's Pastors' Conference), you will not regret it. Getting together with people outside your current ministry and learning from experts will only help and challenge you...and maybe even change your whole life and ministry.

That's what happened to me.

It was the late 90's. I didn't know what CPC was.  I was an unpaid children's pastor (the leadership didn't even call it that at first) and I was at the end of my proverbial rope. Although I have had other times in my ministry when I felt like quitting, this particular time was one of the darker times I remember. I didn't sense the leadership had any kind of vision for children's ministries.  I was having a hard time getting volunteers. I was under stress, lonely, and feeling like I had exhausted my internal resources and getting no results.

Every year, we took a group to our local children's ministry network conference. It was a one day session, with workshops and a few vendor tables, and usually a nationally known speaker.  I always got a lot out of these conferences.  But this particular one was different.  After the conference ended, I planned to hand in my resignation.

I don't remember who was leading our worship time.  But one of the songs he delivered was "I Am Child" by Mr. J.  I had never heard of Mr. J, but this song hit me hard.  It talked about something I had always known, but maybe never comprehended; namely, that children have the same power of the King in them as do adults.  I listened....and gulped...and fought back tears. The ministry to children was more than just the children's program at the church...it was vitally, deeply, eternally important!

And then came the keynote speaker. I won't tell you who it was (msg me if you really want to know), but even though I had heard other speakers through the years, this one approached children's ministry like it was not only the most important ministry in the world, but the most fun.  I laughed, I cried, I scribbled notes, and felt I couldn't breathe.  This man was articulating all the reasons I enjoyed children's ministries, plus all the ways that children's ministry could be so much more than a Sunday morning program.

I didn't resign.  Instead, God used that conference to rip into my being and pull out a fire for children's ministry.

I've had other low times.  I've also been to other conferences, including CPC (don't get me started...if you can, you have to go!). I'm no longer the children's pastor (another long post), but the Lord has allowed me to teach some children's ministry workshops.  And to think I almost walked away from one of the greatest adventures of all.

Why do I think you ought to go to conferences?  Because our God can use it to provide the turning point in your ministry. 

That's what happened to me.


.

AN OPEN LETTER TO CARTOON NETWORK

Dear Cartoon Network:

Many years ago, I heard that one of the perks of basic cable was this channel that ran many of the classic cartoons I grew up with. Sadly, by the time I joined the 21st century and got hooked up, many of the "oldies but goodies" had been replaced with more modern stories and original programming. My visits to Cartoon Network became very scarce. Then came the programming block known as "Adult Swim." My periodic visits to CN slowed to none.

So imagine my surprise--well, not "surprise", more like "oh really?"--when I heard about Black Jesus, described as a hard drinking, weed smoking, obscenity spewing take on the Savior of the world.  I watched the trailer for the series, complete with bleeped parts, and wondered, "did anybody at Cartoon Network think this through?"

I mean, seriously!  After my initial revulsion, and after reading some articles and comments about the show, I understand the premise.  The title character is not intended to be the real Jesus (as if anybody would mistake him for the genuine article). Instead, he is a crazy homeless man who thinks he's Jesus.  I get it.  The plot line of someone thinking he is the Son of God has been done in books, plays, tvs, and movies.  When done well, the device can call attention to the role of religion and identity, the plights of the mentally ill, and society's reactions to those who are different.  But based on the trailer, I feel as though Black Jesus totally misses the opportunity to explore these weightier issues.

I haven't seen every representation of "disturbed man thinks he's Jesus," but in the ones I have seen and remember, the deluded individuals tend to almost out-Jesus Jesus. In other words, they take the meek, quiet, loving stereotype of Jesus to the nth degree, making him almost super meek, super quiet, super loving and gentle, with pious platitudes and all.   Black Jesus, on the other hand, is crude and foul mouthed and violent.  Aside from self-identifying himself as "Jesus," there is nothing in his actions, attitudes, or speech that would identify him as Jesus. Little kids certainly are not going to want to be around him. He is a stereotype, not of the Lord, but of a hardened gang banger or street thug. The opportunity to comment on bigger issues is lost.

Is Black Jesus satire or parody?  I don't know. I have seen some excellent and amusing sketches about Christians, Christianity, and even Jesus. I've also seen a lot that fall flat with Christian audiences. Why? Because the writers of these comedies go for the quick laugh by trying to make fun of a caricature.  They rely on exaggerated claims, half-truths, and prejudices and play these things for chuckles.  It works for audiences who don't really know the subject of the parody, but comes across as cheap and even mean to those who do. You may have the noble goal of lampooning society's attitude toward those who are different.  You may even believe that your interpretation of Jesus sticks it to church hypocrites. But unless you make it very clear that the "Jesus" of this show is a crazy, homeless man, it's just going to fall flat as "cutting edge" social satire or parody or even plain comedy.

Why use Jesus? My sneaking suspicion is that the writers and producers got together and somebody meekly raised his hand and asked, "Excuse me, but won't this offend Christians?" To which the head echelon chuckled and said, "Golly, gosh, yeah it will." I've already seen comments from supporters of the series lauding the show and chiding the faithful for their objections.  Cartoon Network appears to say, "Yeah, we're taking potshots at your Lord and Savior.  You got a problem with that?"

So, Cartoon Network, here's the thing: based on the trailer and the initial comments, I think Black Jesus fails as social commentary, fails as satire, and only succeeds in being deliberately offensive to the Christian community. I don't know your demographics to know how many evangelical, Bible-believing Christians tune in to Adult Swim. I'm sure the born again market won't be watching Black Jesus. I will not be watching and I will not recommend it to my friends. There will be an audience, but I doubt you will win any converts.

Sincerely,

Timotheous

RETRO: SIX SONGS AND A TAPE RECORDER

(Disclaimer: this post is just for fun).

Before file sharing, I-Tunes, YouTube, and the greater world of digital recording, my little reel-to-reel tape recorder was also the means by which I could record my favorite songs.  My sister handed it down to me when I was a kid. With this device, I produced five minute shows featuring audio skits, impersonations, and variety programs. I captured sound effects and theme songs in order to produce my own parodies and spin-offs of Star Trek, Emergency!, Adam-12, and more. It was a fun time. But I also tried to capture my favorite tunes. For hours, I would listen on my trusty transistor radio to my favorite station (KDZA, for all you southern Colorado natives old enough to remember).  My microphone would rest in front of the speakers, the tape reel cued up and ready.  As soon as the opening notes of a "must capture" tune would start playing, I hit record and remained absolutely silent while my electronic marvel recorded a song I would then be able to play and enjoy whenever I wanted.

The following are the top six songs that I attempted to record.  This list doesn't mean there weren't other songs I enjoyed.  It was tough to narrow down the favorites.  It also doesn't mean I necessarily succeeded in producing a recording for each song.  But for me, and perhaps for some of you, these songs will bring back memories.

My Eyes Adored You (Frankie Valli). 
Some of the best stories start with "There was this girl..." In second grade, that girl was Ida.  My crush on her wasn't so serious as to be debilitating, but when I moved to a different town, I found myself missing her.  And then I heard this song and it seemed to sum up all those feelings.

Ida and I later reconnected via snail mail and continued a friendly correspondence through junior high and high school, until some misunderstanding ended the communication. Yes, kids, before Facebook, there was still....drama!

How Do You Do (Mouth and MacNeal)
With most songs, I didn't stop to ponder the lyrics.  I can't even say I knew most of the lyrics. But my connection with How Do You Do is that my sister and I made up our own parody about two monkeys meeting each other.

      How do you do, uh, huh (shaking hands in rhythm to the song)
      I thought I saw na-na-na-na
     Just me and you
     And then we eat bananas (peeling bananas)
     Just like before... (I don't remember the rest)

What can I say...I was a bit of a dork back then.

The Night Chicago Died (Paper Lace)
As I said before, I wasn't always aware of the lyrics of each song.  But this one is special, in that I actually memorized the words.  And while I enjoyed the song on its own merits, I also had fun imagining the sound effects that could applied.

     I heard my momma cry (uncontrollable sobbing)....
     There was no sound at all, but the clock upon the wall (loud ticking sounds)....
     And the door burst open wide (loud crashing)....

Yeah, fun times

Old Black Water (Doobie Brothers)
Yes, poor innocent me didn't know what a "doobie" was until a few years later. But I enjoyed this song, with its easy going melody, harmony, and amazing acapella part.  C'mon, you know you want to hear some funky Dixieland, pretty mama gonna take me by the hand....by the hand (hand), take me by the hand (pretty mama).....

Frankenstein (Edgar Winter Group)
Even if you don't know the title of this instrumental, you would probably recognize some of the portions.  This song had hard driving guitars, drum duos, and special effects with synthesizers and amplifiers.  As I listened to it on the radio, I waited for the end part where it sounded like a UFO was about to land.

When I rediscovered the performance on YouTube, I found out the radio version was an abbreviated version of the song.  The original was 9-12 minutes (depending on the performance). And whenever I watch it, it seems as if Mr. Winter throws in something different each time.  That's talent.

Long Tall Glasses (Leo Sayer)
This was another song whose lyrics I remembered.  It was just a fun song about a guy who finds himself at a fancy dinner with only one requirement: you've got to dance like Fred Astaire.  As I sang along with my best voice, my family's attention was quickly diverted from my dancing skills.


What were your favorite songs growing up?  Did you try to capture a song off the radio?  Share in the comments below.
.

IS GOD TRYING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING?

Have you ever had a series of mishaps which have prompted a friend to sagely declare, "Maybe God is trying to tell you something?"

It's true that God can use our circumstances to "steer" us in the right direction. But being somewhat over-analytical, I find myself falling into the trap of picking apart the events of life and wondering if that was the sign, if that was the wake-up call, if that was the turning point I ignored.  Or to quote the illustrious philosopher Bugs Bunny, "I knew I should have taken that left turn in Albuquerque!"

I believe part of the problem I face is trying to zero in on what God is trying to tell me through the circumstances. Consider these two verses from the book of Acts:

• Acts 9:7 And the men who journeyed with him stood speechless, hearing a voice but seeing no one.
• Acts 22:9  And those who were with me indeed saw the light and were afraid, but they did not hear the voice of Him who spoke to me.

The context is Paul's conversion. He and his SWAT team were heading to Damascus to arrest some Christians, when Jesus spoke to him out of a bright light.  As described in Acts 9, the men heard a voice. But when Paul gives his testimony in Acts 22, he says the men did not hear the voice.

But what seems like an apparent contradiction actually sums up the way I feel at times.  I know my Greek scholar colleagues could break it down in far more technical detail, but in Acts 9, the men heard the sound of a voice, but in Acts 22, they didn't hear what the voice was saying.  Have you ever heard people talking, but couldn't make out what they were saying?  You heard the words, but couldn't discern the meaning.  If you're a parent, you've probably exclaimed, "Didn't you hear a word I said?" Yeah, mom and dad, sound waves entered my ears, vibrated, and created the sensation of hearing.  But I was tuned out at the time.

Last night, I was at a meeting and at several points, I felt like I was "hearing a voice" of direction for ministry.  But like the men traveling with Paul, I couldn't seem to zero in on what the voice was saying. It wasn't anything weird like, "go down the road and buy pepperoni pizza for the board." (come to think of it, maybe the chairman was whispering to me to do that!). I told my wife about it and she asked (like she does so many times when I talk about life strategy), "So what are you going to do about it?"  And my reply was something like, "I don't know...I'm still missing some pieces."  I'm hearing the voice, but there are some pretty huge gaps in my understanding of what the voice is telling me.

So....what am I going to do about it?  In my younger days, I would have said, "Come on honey, I believe God is telling me to move to the Yukon.  Let's list the house, pack up the U-Haul, and head north to Alaska.  Yeah, we're going north, the rush is on."  But now I'm a little more cautious.  I sense and even desire a new adventure in faith, but I want to make sure that it's God directing the adventure.  I don't want to be the guy who is asked later, "Were you sent, or did you just went?"

I realize this post doesn't have a lot of answers. If you are looking for a bullet list of pointers,  just google "how to find God's will for your life" and you'll find a plethora of advice (I mean that sincerely...there is a lot of helpful info out there).  But sometimes, we just need to be honest with our questions.

Hmmmm..I think God is trying to tell me something.  What is it?

.

 

THREE ADJUSTMENTS TO THE CULTURE OF CHANGE

Inauguration of the President. 
Passing of the Olympic Torch. 
Jay Leno's Tonight Show farewell. 
Ministries with staying power.

What do all these have in common?  They highlight the power of transition, the strength of tradition, and the importance of continuity.

As a children's pastor (and before that, a senior pastor), I knew that change was good.  Mix things up from time to time, add surprises, don't succumb to what Ronnie Caldwell termed "routine ruts."  I believed that then and I still believe it.  The church simply cannot lock itself into the past with a "we've never done it that way before" mentality.  Modern children's ministries get this, unleashing programs and curriculum that are far different from even the time I started in kidmin.  And while some churches and their programs may be stuck in ritualistic gridlock, I do know many, many churches that are experiencing the joy and freedom that comes from not doing it the same way over and over again.

But if I may add a corrective adjustment to the ongoing dialogue on change, I believe ministries that make an impact in families over a long term need to have the elements listed above: transition, tradition, and continuity.

Continuity.  Jay Leno may have been host of The Tonight Show for 22 years, but the show itself has been an institution on late night TV for 60-something years.  Although showcasing vastly different talents from its hosts, it's still The Tonight Show.

Although I loved to shake things up and bring wonder and surprise with the kids, I always made sure the basic core of our program ("Sunday Morning Celebration") was the same every week.  Kids took comfort in the fact that, even though there was something different happening (rearranging chairs, changing the set, lining up tables differently, special surprises), it was still their children's program.  They could count on it.  What we did 15 years ago was different than what we did in the present, but it was still "Sunday Morning Celebration."

Tradition.  Contrary to popular belief, "tradition" is not a dirty word.  The Bible is full of examples of ritual and repetition done for the express purpose of remembrance and teaching. I think there is a value in tradition that we often overlook.

Sometimes we have traditions that have lost their meaning or intent.  But other traditions serve as reminders of great spiritual victories, important lessons, or rich history.  Take weddings for instance.  I've seen some strange nuptials,  but for the most part, weddings have the same basic format.  As the couple exchange vows and the music plays, the couples in the audience lean a little closer together.  Why? Because whether they are consciously aware of it or not, they are remembering and reaffirming their own wedding day.  It's a powerful jump start to their memories.

Whether it is a nightly routine at home or a weekly routine at church, it is worth examining the traditions and rituals we have: what they represent and what they are trying to teach us.

Transition.  This is where continuity meets tradition.  Presidential inaugurations are a great example of this.  Every four years, there is a ceremony in which there is a peaceful transfer of power, often between staunch political adversaries.  This transition, with all its accompanying ritual, is important to show transition.

A sense of transition is important.  Barring matters of moral or doctrinal deviation, there should be a smooth transition when a volunteer or staff member leaves. A recognition, an opportunity to say farewell, and some kind of announcement is in order.  This not only provides a sense of closure, but a sense of assurance that, even though there is a change, the ministry goes on.  Some of the longest running, most stable churches with which I am familiar have a strong sense of transition.   Retiring volunteers are celebrated, memories made in an older part of the building are treasured before the building is renovated, and a major change in program is looked back upon fondly, even as the new program is anticipated with excitement.

What does your ministry do to provide for transitions? What traditions do you hold in your family and church? What kind of continuity do you have in your programs and departments.  I'd love to hear your comments below.

.

RAMBLING THOUGHTS ON THE HAM / NYE DEBATE

With the upcoming debate between creation scientist Ken Ham and evolution scientist Bill Nye, I thought I'd share a few thoughts and opinions.  Just a couple of disclaimers before we begin: these are working opinions, "thinking through my keyboard" if you will. I'm always asking questions and pointing out things in an effort to get everyone to think, so before either side blasts away at what I say here, just calm down, read carefully, and respond constructively. Second, I am neither a professional scientist, nor a professional theologian, but I admit I've spent more time in the latter field than the former. If you want to parse Hebrew verbs and ancient Semitic literature types at me or you want to pick apart a cell or DNA strand, I'll need a bit of time to look it all up.

The debate has been heavily reported as a contest between "science" and "religion."  I think that is misleading for a couple of reasons.  First of all, this is hardly the first epic debate on this topic.  I had the privilege of attending a college that shared the campus with a prominent creationist organization.  We had a front row seat to see the so-called "creationist movement" in the early 80's, when names like Morris, Gish, and yes, even Ham were engaged in debates with evolutionary scientists. At first, the evolution profs would try to debate the merits of the Scripture, laying out alleged Bible contradictions and seeming moral inconsistencies, while the creationist profs would carefully bring out their arguments from biology and geology to show the inconsistencies of evolution and the strength of the creationist model.  After a short time (and widespread public response), the universities quit sending their scientists. 

Phase two (which I look upon as the golden era of debates) was when the scientists decided to get serious about debating science and not the integrity of the Bible.  These were great evenings of direct clashes between the champions of evolution and the champions of creation. And using the criteria of formal debate, I have to honestly say that sometimes, the evolutionists did a better job presenting their case.  But at some point, the evolutionary scientists decided that creation was only about religion and debating creationists about science was as absurd as an aardvark playing in the NBA.  Since then, the mantra of evolutionary scientists has been "science equals evolution. If it isn't evolution, it isn't science." Case closed.  So the reason the Ham/Nye (Hy? Nyam?) debate is getting so much attention is that we've forgotten the good old days.

The second reason the "science vs religion" moniker is misleading is because it suggests that science and religion are incompatible. They're not incompatible, they simply deal with two different world views.  Trying to line up the two to compare is well nigh impossible (no pun intended).  If Ham sticks to the articulation and examination of verifiable scientific facts and if Nye does the same, we're going to have a good debate.  If Nye trots out a list of Bible difficulties and how Christians are responsible for war, slavery, and the Tea Party movement, it will end, at best, as an exercise in condescension, and, at worst, a total confirmation of what the press is calling it: "science vs religion." If you want a good debate, it has to be "science vs. science" or "religion vs. religion."

While I feel the hype between "science and religion" is misleading, I think there is a more fundamental point that is being overlooked in this great, grand event.  You see, Ken Ham is what is known as a "young earth creationist." But as other Christian pundits have pointed out, there are other models of creationism besides "young earth." Theistic evolution, progressive creationism, day-age, gap--all of these are touted by some pretty knowledgeable people who maintain that evolution and the Bible are not in conflict.  Would not a debate between Bill Nye and a creationist scientist who is actually trying to make peace with evolution be a more interesting discussion? Maybe, but it ignores a pretty big difference.

Aside from the young earth model, most of the other theories of creation tend to focus on how to explain evolution in the context of the Bible.  It's almost as if the scientists who are Christians woke up in a cold sweat exclaiming, "the fact of evolution is so overwhelming, how can we possibly accommodate it?"  Solution: God used evolution to bring the universe into existence. Whew...problem solved! Yes, I'm grossly oversimplifying and I intend no disrespect to those scientists who hold to these models, but all of them, to one degree or another, inject an evolution element into their view.

The problem I see is that committed evolutionists are not as accommodating with creation. I can almost guarantee that the evolution scientist is not sitting up in bed saying, "the Bible is so compelling, how can we fit it into evolution?" To put it even more simply, evolution does not need God.  There is no mechanism of evolution that requires a Divine Being. You can assert that "God used evolution to create the world," but a committed evolutionist will just nod and smile and think, "evolution did just fine on its own." Even the hint of God is rejected, as we saw in the whole "Intelligent Design" debate  a few years ago. A theory as innocuous and watered-down and generic as I.D. was still soundly rejected because it included somebody bigger than you and I.  Evolution works just fine without any intelligent Maker, thank you very much.

Just for the record, I believe in an actual 6 day creation and world-wide flood (I no longer hold the view, however, that a young earth is the dogmatic essential to Christian faith. I may lean toward it, but I don't think it's a hill on which I want to do battle). And I am convinced, that even though evolutionism doesn't need God, so too God doesn't need evolution.  And maybe, in the long run, the debate between Ken Ham and Bill Nye isn't so much about science, but about competing world views: one in which God is irrelevant in life, the universe, and everything, and one in which He is central and supreme.

WHAT TO DO WHEN LEADERSHIP DOESN'T BACK YOU

The category is Hard Lessons to Learn.  The final answer is, "Without this element, your children's ministry will likely go downhill."

What is, "The Support and Backing of the Church Leadership."

It's true.  You can attend all the classes and conferences to learn all the latest techniques, you can have a blast with the kids, you can be well loved and well admired by parents, and you can have the best, most dazzling program that the church has ever seen.  But if the elders, deacons, pastoral staff, or other governing body isn't behind the work, you will face a tough road.

When you sense that maybe you are not getting the support of the church leadership, what can you do?  Here are a few suggestions:

1.  Be the best.  It's tempting when you learn that the board doesn't back you to respond by cutting back your efforts.  Don't.  Your job is to glorify God and reach kids and that requires our very best, no matter who notices, doesn't notice, or even works against it.

2.  Make sure your program lines up with the church's mission.  It's important that your pastor and leaders know that the children's department is a vital part of the church, not a competitor.

3.  Share the wins with the leadership.  A testimony of how little Toby trusted Jesus in Sunday School, or how five pre-teens expressed interest in the mission field will often encourage the board as the vitality of the work.

4.  Meet regularly with your pastor. Make it a part of your schedule. If you can turn your pastor into a raving fan, he can become the biggest cheerleader before the board.

5.  Be willing to change. Read between the lines of the comments and mine the beneficial nuggets that will help propel your ministry further.

6.  Ask.  The apparent lack of support could be a matter of misunderstanding or lack of communication.  You may just have to lay your concerns before the board and trust for a turnaround.

7.  Be prepared for rejection.  Sometimes, a lack of support is just that: the board doesn't support you. It could be driven by church politics or marketing, or it could be a lack of understanding about what children's ministries is all about.  Sometimes you can't do anything.  It may be that the Lord is directing you into another area of ministry at your church or another church.  Be ready.

Above all, throughout all, pray.  Keep your eyes on Jesus.  Sometimes it sounds trite, especially when you hear the whisperings from the leadership about what you're doing.  But the Lord's peace will embrace you through the difficult decisions.

Lack of support from the church leadership is a hard lesson to figure out.  But even when your ministry appears to be in jeopardy, you can always lean on the Lord as you go through the storm.
    

PREPARATION TIPS FOR YOUR LESSONS

It's that time again.  You've received your copy of the teacher's manual.  There is the passage of Scripture and several pages of teaching notes, object lessons, life application stories, and maybe a craft or two.  What do you do next?

Sadly, there are teachers who pick up "easy to prepare" lesson manuals and read them over on Saturday night during commercials.  After all, it's all laid out so the teacher doesn't have to "do" anything, right? I once observed a teacher reading the lesson right out of the teacher's book! She only paused long enough to pick up the prop that the book indicated (at least she didn't actually read the words, "pick up prop").

 There is a lot of hard work and preparation that goes into writing these manuals and I appreciate the role they play in children's ministries. But it has been my observation that some teachers are intent on "teaching the curriculum" instead of actually teaching the Bible. I believe if the publisher's lesson is the sum total of preparation and presentation, it is actually shortchanging the kids in the class.

Assuming you've picked up the lesson guide in plenty of time to prepare, what is a good way to approach the upcoming lesson, to take advantage of the work of the experts, but not rely on that work as the final answer on how you do your class? Here are some steps that may help:

• Read your lesson book through once, making note of the main passage of Scripture
• Read the main passage of Scripture repeatedly in different translations. If it is only a verse or two, read the verses surrounding it to get the context.  This allows you to be comfortable and knowledgeable about what the passage says.
• Seek to understand what the passage means and how it connects to the whole of Scripture.  There is a plethora of commentaries, study guides, printed, audio, and video sermons available to aid you in your study.
• Ask yourself the point of the passage for your life today. Does the passage command something, give you an example to follow (or avoid), or teach you an attitude to emulate?
• If you had no other resources, how would you present this passage to the children in your class?
• Open your lesson book and see how the publisher does it.  Go over it until the lesson is not only familiar to  you, but actually "fits" the personality of your class.
• And then, if possible, leave your teacher's manual at home! Nothing brings more energy to a classroom than the teacher directly interacting with the students instead of reading them a lesson.  The only book you should actually be reading from is the Bible.

I'm not suggesting you have to be a Bible scholar, conjugating Greek verbs and looking up comments from the anti-Nicene fathers.  Nor am I suggesting reinventing the proverbial wheel: if the manual has a great illustration, activity, or turn-of-phrase, by all means use it.  But in the end, remember, you are not teaching a curriculum, you are teaching the Scripture.  The lesson guide is a tool to help you do it.

What kind of methods do you use to prepare your lessons? I'd love to hear your ideas in the comments section.

WHY RETAILERS SHOULD SAY MERRY CHRISTMAS...AND WHY THEY SHOULDN'T (the war continues)

Image courtesy of Free Clipart N Images

As I've done on previous occasions (here and here), I am going to make a valiant attempt to bring some perspective into the whole "Merry Christmas" vs. "Happy Holidays" debate.  I am convinced more than ever that retailers should absolutely drop this "Happy Holidays" thing and wish folks a "Merry Christmas" instead (huge cheer goes up from the crowd).

I am also just as convinced that businesses shouldn't be forced to say "Merry Christmas" at all (puzzled gasps and snorts of outrage from the crowd).

How can I hold such seemingly contradictory opinions?  The answer is simple: here in America, there are three Christmases.  At times they are distinct and at times they overlap, but if you understand these three, it helps bring some focus on the issue of proper greetings.

The three Christmases are as follows:

• Trappings Christmas
• Secular Christmas
• True Christmas

The first "Christmas" is not really Christmas at all, but the vestiges of some pagan celebrations.  Many of the trappings of Christmas have a distinctly non-Christian origin.  If you don't believe me, either google things like "yule logs," "mistletoe," or even "December 25." Or ask a Jehovah's Witness or even certain Christian ministers and they will tell you the origins of all these things and why, therefore, you should not celebrate Christmas (or Easter, for that matter).

I don't agree with the whole "Christmas is pagan; therefore, we should not celebrate it" argument.  For one thing, the original meaning of many of these trappings has been lost in antiquity (do you anybody who seriously bows down and worships their Christmas tree?).  For another thing,  many of the trappings have been "re-purposed" in meaning (tree points upward to the one true God, lights remind us of the Light of the world, evergreen calls to mind the eternal life He gives us, and so on). While these can be wonderful parts of the season, they are not the essence of Christmas. 

The second Christmas, the secular kind, is especially prevalent in the United States. This is the season of giving, the season of spending time with loved ones, the season of joy, yeah, even the season of peace of earth and good will toward man.  It is also the season of festive parties, raucous music, glittering lights, and unbelievable consumerism. When people say, "Christmas has become too materialistic," they are referring to the secular Christmas.

Here we get to the crux of my split feelings on the phrase "Merry Christmas."  To begin with, let's get our annual reminder out of the way: the phrase "Happy Holidays" is nothing new, nor was it invented to try to undermine the Christian faith. If I've said it once, I've said it a dozen times: the poor clerk who wished you "Happy Holidays" is NOT the enemy. Don't be snide or snotty about it, just smile, say "thank you" and "Merry Christmas," and be on your way. 

Now I happen to think that the retail expression "Happy Holidays" is silly. Think about it:  Stores employ Christmas trees, Christmas lights, Christmas decorations, and pipe in Christmas music, in hopes that people will buy a bunch of Christmas presents in preparation for Christmas day.  Nobody is fooled by "Seasons Greetings." If someone is truly, deeply offended by Christmas, the huge Christmas tree at the entrance of the store cannot magically be transformed into a "holiday tree."

So my advice to retailers is: just say "Merry Christmas." (and the crowd goes wild!)

And that brings us to the third Christmas: the commemoration of the birth of Jesus.  God the Son, the Second Person of the Trinity, became a human being, born of a virgin, lived a sinless life, died on the cross to pay the price for your sins and mine, then three days later rose bodily from the grave, so that by trusting Him as our Lord and Savior, we can have everlasting life and a day-to-day relationship with Him.  (try fitting that on a Christmas card!)

I believe that to be true.  I have a lot of reasons for believing it to be true.  It is at once a story simply told and a profound statement of deep personal faith and resounding theology. When I say "Merry Christmas," I'm making a declaration of faith (whether the other guy is aware of it or not).  And I believe this depth of faith is one of the reasons why Christians get so worked up over "Happy Holidays." It's somehow replacing something meaningful in our lives with something that is almost frivolous.  I get that.

But let's think for a second: if a retailer says, "Merry Christmas," there is a real possibility they are acknowledging the secular, consumer driven holiday and not the historical truth of the birth of Christ.  My reasons for saying "Merry Christmas" are different than their reasons for saying, "Merry Christmas." And unless the clerk or manager or CEO wants to make that personal statement of faith in the One whose birth we are celebrating, I'd just as soon they either stick to "Happy Holidays" or give me a few minutes to introduce them to Him (a hush falls on the crowd).

There are so many fronts to the battle.  Personally, I do not believe the banner a store hangs in its window or the greeting the clerks are instructed to give people is a front upon which I want to fight.
You don't have to agree or disagree with me today.  Just think about it.

Oh...Merry Christmas!

,

RANDOM THOUGHTS ON THANKSGIVING SHOPPING

I love Thanksgiving.  I love the time with my family, the good food, the warmth of an easy chair as I drift into a satisfying tryptophanic coma.

Yet a quiet day of family and giving thanks has been jarred by the retailers who want to push Black Friday into Thanksgiving Thursday.  So between advertisements announcing fantastic "doorbuster" specials and the voices of Christians and conservatives decrying this "war against families," my peaceful holiday is shaping up to be not so relaxing.

So where do I stand on this?  I'm glad you asked.

I will NOT be shopping on Thanksgiving Day.  I will NOT recommend or encourage anyone to shop on Thanksgiving Day. My heart goes out to the employees who have to work on Thanksgiving Day.

However, I do feel compelled to point out a somewhat obvious truth:

No one is forcing anyone to shop on Thanksgiving Day.

For all the rhetoric about how retailers are destroying family values, the fact is, taking advantage of a sale is totally voluntary.  A family makes a CHOICE to abandon the dirty dishes and push, shove, and squirm their way through a crowd of determined bargain hunters. Messy? Yes.  Not very family friendly? Sure.  Mandatory? No.

You see, while I agree in spirit with the outcry against retailers opening up on Thanksgiving, I have a problem with what the outcry says about our values as a family.  If our family values are 1) only manifested one day out the year and 2) easily disrupted by a "doorbuster" ad, then we've got a bigger problem then retailers hoping to turn a profit.  Maybe it's time to re-examine just what "family values" and "giving thanks" mean in our own lives.

Retailers are driven by profit.  So stopping the "Thanksgiving shopping" movement is simple (in theory anyway): if enough people feel strongly about the family Thanksgiving that they will stay home, then it will cease being worth the retailer's time and expense of being open.

Yeah, I know it's a simple solution to a big problem.  But I've got to start somewhere.

Meanwhile, while folks scoop up the last of the gravy, get on their coats, and head out to find some bargains, I'm going to seek out that one comfortable chair and "rest my eyes for just a couple of minutes," while my daughters make fun of me as I start to snore.

Happy Thanksgiving.

.

THREE THINGS WHILE I WAIT

One question I'm often asked is, "What have you been doing with yourself, now that you're not longer in children's ministries?" That's an excellent question. Of course, I'm still busy. I do a lot of "behind-the-scenes" work in the church office. I still fill the pulpit at my church and in other churches. I even occasionally lend a hand with a local child care center.
     But there are three things that summarize what I've been doing while I'm waiting for the next phase, level, assignment, or calling.

1. Resting
     I never realized how much of my mind and body went into children's ministry until I wasn't doing it anymore. It's not that the work was bad or anything.  Like a lot of folks in kidmin, I thrived on it. The first Saturday after my resignation took effect, I kept thinking I needed to finish up the music mix and power point presentation for Sunday morning. But reality hit and I realized I had nothing to do for the first time in many years.
     Since then, I've learned to enjoy the rest. My mind is free to concentrate on other things. When the worship service is over, I can leave and go home instead of staying an extra hour for take down. If I'm sick or not feeling well, I can stay home and rest. It took a while, but my mind doesn't drift to "the back room" during the service anymore. It's very liberating.

2. Re-equipping
     Just because I'm physically out of kidmin doesn't mean I'm done with kidmin.  I don't know what the Lord has planned for me in the future, but I still have a heart for children's ministry and, therefore, I want to stay sharp. I'm continuing to read the literature, explore the websites, and listen to the recordings of dozens of children's ministry experts. I made a list of all the workshops and seminars I've attended over the years and have started to review the notes I took.
     When I worked at a child care center, we were mandated to have 15 hours of continuing education each year. In a way, my current regimen of review serves as continuing education in the world of children's ministry, training me for whatever the next phase will be.

3.  Re-inventing.
     I've always been a student at heart, but during this current season, I'm taking it to the next level. Finances and time are always problematic, but I have always wanted to return to school and finish some advanced degrees. I'm not sure when that will happen, but I'm on the lookout for some good extension programs that will allow me to do most of the courses on line.
     But in the meantime, since I've been out of a formal classroom for awhile, I've created my own course of study, utilizing text books, online lectures, and syllabi.  The purpose is to discipline myself to regular, systematic study for when the door opens to a more formal program.  There are no tests, of course, and I'm moving at my own pace, but it's amazingly stretching to sit and take organized notes on a two hour lecture (okay, no smirking comments from you doctoral students!)

If you find yourself in a transition period, an interim time, a "between seasons" phase, then take advantage of the change to re-charge your soul, mind, and body, so that whatever the next level is, you'll be ready.

.

PRINCIPLES FOR PURSUING THE DREAM

A short time ago, I had the privilege of speaking at my church's morning worship service about dreams. It wasn't about the esoteric, subconscious, whimsical kind of dream, but rather the kind of dreaming related to goals and desires. As often happens, I felt there was a lot more that could be said on the subject than I was able to share.

A couple of years ago, I was forced to resign as children's pastor (after 15 years).  It was nothing of a moral nature, nothing scandalous, just a matter of politics and marketing. Since children's ministry was such a huge part of my life for so long, I suddenly found myself in a time of transition between what I knew and the great unknown.  I believe God used that to steer me toward the message about dreams.

As I thought further, I came up with three totally random principles that I'd like to share. I'm sure there are more (and for the benefit of those of you in management, motivation, or career building fields, I'm well aware that there is a strict technical difference among dreams, vision, goals, and so on.  I'm sort of lumping everything together in this post and I'll leave it to you to fine tune the definitions).

1.  Seek counsel that will help you, not discourage you. Surround yourself with people who will be your biggest cheerleaders and supporters.  Now here's the caveat: wise counsel can and should let you know if you're not ready, not able, or not suited to a task or ministry. But there is a difference between the critic who doesn't "get it" and thinks it's his duty to let you know that he doesn't think you're the man or woman for the job and the wise counselor who will help you define, refine, and adjust your dreams and goals.
(if you are in children's ministry, you might invest in some "coaching" services, such as Kidology, Jim Wideman, and others).

2.  Surprise people with the best.  Remember Susan Boyle? She had a dream to perform on stage and got her chance on Britain's Got Talent. The judges rolled their eyes and the audience snickered...until Ms. Boyle sang. Jaws dropped and eyes widened as this powerful and beautiful voice rang out. Go to YouTube and search for "emotional" or "surprising" auditions for shows like America's Got Talent, X-Factor, or the Voice (make sure you grab some tissues!). What these videos have in common is the total shock and amazement of the judges and audience when the least likely candidate nails a performance.
   In like fashion, we should always put our best proverbial foot forward in everything we do, especially matters pertaining to our goals, aspirations, and dreams. Go beyond what is expected and do the unexpected. Polish that presentation, dress a notch above the standard dress code, make sure all the elements of your lesson are ready and in place, practice and refine that song. And when your best comes out, the observers will be amazed.

3.  Patience and flexibility go together. One of the most profound sayings in pursuing our objectives is this gem: "Lather, rinse, repeat."  Actually, it came from a shampoo bottle, but think of the implications.  If you work up the suds as you follow your dreams and desires, but somewhere along the way, you get knocked off course, what do you do? For me, it was (and still is) a time of evaluation, re-equipping, and enrichment.  It's a "rinsing" time.  Maybe the Lord wants me back in a different children's ministry.  Maybe He wants me to return to a broader teaching ministry. And maybe He just wants me to write books and articles.  At this point, I am patiently waiting until time to "lather" again.
   By the way, do not confuse waiting with idleness. Sitting around doing nothing is a dream killer. Read, study, take a course, keep your mind active with a hobby, and keep your eyes open for new opportunities.

What would you add to the list?  I would love to hear your feedback and comments.

.