AN ESSAY ON GETTING OLDER

 I have a senior friend at church who is fond of reminding me that "getting old ain't for sissies." I never appreciated what that meant until I got older.

It is sad when a vehicle starts breaking down the minute the manufacturer's warning expires. I'm convinced this happened to me at some point. The warranty expired and things that never hurt before now ache with a jarring regularity. Limbs that could climb a hill and dodge and weave in a backyard football game start to object upon arising from bed. When my older friends used to tell me about their medical issues, I used to nod in sympathy. Nowadays, I nod in affirmation, then share my own!

Do not misunderstand. I am far from "over-the-hill" or "washed up." Some wise choices early in life have held off some of the consequences of some not-so-wise choices.  Working in children's ministries for 15-plus years has permanently programmed my brain to "kid mode." My hobbies and interests skew "young." I laugh easily and have been known to break into song at a moment's notice. My ambition and dreams remain active. Like the fictional musical character of Hamilton, I feel compelled to "write like I'm running out of time." This last year, I've started a new project (which I will share another time). If anything, my curiosity and thirst for knowledge has increased.

No doubt, I have earned the gray in what is left of my hair. I am smarter, wiser and more determined in some areas than I ever was. I know more. But with that knowledge comes the realization that I do not know as much as I thought I did earlier in life. My heart breaks far easier at the growing divineness in our society, the embrace of things that God has warned us about, the presence of real injustice, and the knee-jerk abandonment of faith and values. I grieve for friends who have lost their lives--the number sadly grows--but I also grieve for those who have lost their love for their Creator.

Forgive me for using a stodgy expression, but as I think about this "stage of my life," I like what the psalmist says: 

"How precious is Your lovingkindness, O God! Therefore the children of men put their trust under the shadow of Your wings. They are abundantly satisfied with the fullness of Your house, and You give them drink from the river of Your pleasures. For with You is the fountain of life; in Your light we see light."  (Psalm 36:7-9)

"Getting old ain't for sissies." But in the satisfaction of the Lord's presence, the years ahead are full of hope.

THINKING ABOUT MARGINS

I once listened to a speech about the necessity of "margins" in one's life. It has stuck with me ever since, especially at those times when I am feeling overwhelmed.

What is a "margin?" I see it as the liberty to adjust or adapt to life's situations because the basics are taken care of. A margin represents extra space, "wiggle room" if you will, to enjoy or to respond to a need. And margins take many forms.

We can have margins with money, where we have enough left over in our budget to enjoy, invest, or do something different, as well as help others.

We can have margins with time, where we have enough extra time to engage in hobbies, enrichment, or service.

We can have margins with health, where our time and energy spent in diet and exercise allows us to do things that we otherwise could not do.

Margins can really apply to anything.

So I get the concept of margins when it comes to money. Like millions of Americans, I often live from paycheck to paycheck, or, in the words of another cliché: "there's too much month left at the end of my money." At those times, I long for margins, to know that I can write a check with the full confidence that I won't have to "rob Peter to pay Paul" (sorry, another cliché!). And then, if my car breaks down or I need an emergency root canal, there is enough margin in my budge to absorb the added expense.

And I sometimes struggle with time management; or more accurately, "priority management." I've got a lot to do, but it seems like the clock speeds up in proportion to my list. I'd love to be caught up, I'd love to be ahead, so that, if something happens that requires my full attention, I'm ready for the task.

But when it comes to margins, I think one thing that burdens me the most is that, without margins, I am often unable to be a blessing to others. Yes, there is the grace of giving and God has proven Himself time and again that He will provide our needs, even in the paycheck to paycheck existence. And I have shifted priorities in the face of a greater need, setting aside something urgent in order to do something important. These things don't change.

But the advantage of a margin is freedom. Freedom to write that extra check to support a missionary or community outreach. Freedom to take time off to volunteer. Freedom to invest in my family (oh, so important). There are advantages to margins.

Of course, margins take work and a deliberate decision to do something about it. Giving extra involves a determination to be a giving person, regardless of your budget. If all you've got is a dollar and someone needs a dime, give them a quarter (or hey, maybe the whole dollar!). Volunteering some extra time may involve giving up your favorite tv show.  Having the buffer in your checkbook may require that you take advantage of good financial and budgeting tools.

(And yes, as another old saying goes, if it seems I'm pointing a finger at you, it's because four others are pointing back as me)

This is not a confession. I'm not saying, "woe is me." Because of my relationship with Jesus Christ, my day to day life is pretty good. Things aren't that bad all the time. But once in awhile, when the deadlines loom and the bills are due and my text messages pile up, I think about the need for space, for breathing room. 

I think about margins.

HAPPY NEW YEAR

HAPPY NEW YEAR!
And welcome to a brand new, simple post for what will hopefully be a new beginning for this blog. You may have noticed a slight change in the title to STILL Incomprehensible by Tim" In other words, it's still by Tim--same guy, a little older, maybe a tad wiser.
     It's still called "Incomprehensible," mainly because you never know what will come up. It could be serious, it could be humorous. It may touch on politics or pop culture. Ministry and children's ministry will be topics. It is (still) a running essay from my brain to your eyes.
     But you can expect to see some other minor changes as the days and weeks go by, mostly cosmetic and some adjustment of how I unfold content. But the biggest change is that I will attempt to keep the blog current. I won't promise a post every day, but I will try my best to post regularly, as opposed to waiting months (or years) to chime in. And if you have ideas on topics, drop a comment below.
     As for today, the first day of a brand new year, I offer no big insights, no pithy observations, no goofy anecdotes, no brilliant satires, or edgy analysis.. Just a simple wish for a blessed 2020 and a timely warning to old and new readers:
      I'm back!

IS GOD TRYING TO TELL YOU SOMETHING?

Have you ever had a series of mishaps which have prompted a friend to sagely declare, "Maybe God is trying to tell you something?"

It's true that God can use our circumstances to "steer" us in the right direction. But being somewhat over-analytical, I find myself falling into the trap of picking apart the events of life and wondering if that was the sign, if that was the wake-up call, if that was the turning point I ignored.  Or to quote the illustrious philosopher Bugs Bunny, "I knew I should have taken that left turn in Albuquerque!"

I believe part of the problem I face is trying to zero in on what God is trying to tell me through the circumstances. Consider these two verses from the book of Acts:

• Acts 9:7 And the men who journeyed with him stood speechless, hearing a voice but seeing no one.
• Acts 22:9  And those who were with me indeed saw the light and were afraid, but they did not hear the voice of Him who spoke to me.

The context is Paul's conversion. He and his SWAT team were heading to Damascus to arrest some Christians, when Jesus spoke to him out of a bright light.  As described in Acts 9, the men heard a voice. But when Paul gives his testimony in Acts 22, he says the men did not hear the voice.

But what seems like an apparent contradiction actually sums up the way I feel at times.  I know my Greek scholar colleagues could break it down in far more technical detail, but in Acts 9, the men heard the sound of a voice, but in Acts 22, they didn't hear what the voice was saying.  Have you ever heard people talking, but couldn't make out what they were saying?  You heard the words, but couldn't discern the meaning.  If you're a parent, you've probably exclaimed, "Didn't you hear a word I said?" Yeah, mom and dad, sound waves entered my ears, vibrated, and created the sensation of hearing.  But I was tuned out at the time.

Last night, I was at a meeting and at several points, I felt like I was "hearing a voice" of direction for ministry.  But like the men traveling with Paul, I couldn't seem to zero in on what the voice was saying. It wasn't anything weird like, "go down the road and buy pepperoni pizza for the board." (come to think of it, maybe the chairman was whispering to me to do that!). I told my wife about it and she asked (like she does so many times when I talk about life strategy), "So what are you going to do about it?"  And my reply was something like, "I don't know...I'm still missing some pieces."  I'm hearing the voice, but there are some pretty huge gaps in my understanding of what the voice is telling me.

So....what am I going to do about it?  In my younger days, I would have said, "Come on honey, I believe God is telling me to move to the Yukon.  Let's list the house, pack up the U-Haul, and head north to Alaska.  Yeah, we're going north, the rush is on."  But now I'm a little more cautious.  I sense and even desire a new adventure in faith, but I want to make sure that it's God directing the adventure.  I don't want to be the guy who is asked later, "Were you sent, or did you just went?"

I realize this post doesn't have a lot of answers. If you are looking for a bullet list of pointers,  just google "how to find God's will for your life" and you'll find a plethora of advice (I mean that sincerely...there is a lot of helpful info out there).  But sometimes, we just need to be honest with our questions.

Hmmmm..I think God is trying to tell me something.  What is it?

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PRINCIPLES FOR PURSUING THE DREAM

A short time ago, I had the privilege of speaking at my church's morning worship service about dreams. It wasn't about the esoteric, subconscious, whimsical kind of dream, but rather the kind of dreaming related to goals and desires. As often happens, I felt there was a lot more that could be said on the subject than I was able to share.

A couple of years ago, I was forced to resign as children's pastor (after 15 years).  It was nothing of a moral nature, nothing scandalous, just a matter of politics and marketing. Since children's ministry was such a huge part of my life for so long, I suddenly found myself in a time of transition between what I knew and the great unknown.  I believe God used that to steer me toward the message about dreams.

As I thought further, I came up with three totally random principles that I'd like to share. I'm sure there are more (and for the benefit of those of you in management, motivation, or career building fields, I'm well aware that there is a strict technical difference among dreams, vision, goals, and so on.  I'm sort of lumping everything together in this post and I'll leave it to you to fine tune the definitions).

1.  Seek counsel that will help you, not discourage you. Surround yourself with people who will be your biggest cheerleaders and supporters.  Now here's the caveat: wise counsel can and should let you know if you're not ready, not able, or not suited to a task or ministry. But there is a difference between the critic who doesn't "get it" and thinks it's his duty to let you know that he doesn't think you're the man or woman for the job and the wise counselor who will help you define, refine, and adjust your dreams and goals.
(if you are in children's ministry, you might invest in some "coaching" services, such as Kidology, Jim Wideman, and others).

2.  Surprise people with the best.  Remember Susan Boyle? She had a dream to perform on stage and got her chance on Britain's Got Talent. The judges rolled their eyes and the audience snickered...until Ms. Boyle sang. Jaws dropped and eyes widened as this powerful and beautiful voice rang out. Go to YouTube and search for "emotional" or "surprising" auditions for shows like America's Got Talent, X-Factor, or the Voice (make sure you grab some tissues!). What these videos have in common is the total shock and amazement of the judges and audience when the least likely candidate nails a performance.
   In like fashion, we should always put our best proverbial foot forward in everything we do, especially matters pertaining to our goals, aspirations, and dreams. Go beyond what is expected and do the unexpected. Polish that presentation, dress a notch above the standard dress code, make sure all the elements of your lesson are ready and in place, practice and refine that song. And when your best comes out, the observers will be amazed.

3.  Patience and flexibility go together. One of the most profound sayings in pursuing our objectives is this gem: "Lather, rinse, repeat."  Actually, it came from a shampoo bottle, but think of the implications.  If you work up the suds as you follow your dreams and desires, but somewhere along the way, you get knocked off course, what do you do? For me, it was (and still is) a time of evaluation, re-equipping, and enrichment.  It's a "rinsing" time.  Maybe the Lord wants me back in a different children's ministry.  Maybe He wants me to return to a broader teaching ministry. And maybe He just wants me to write books and articles.  At this point, I am patiently waiting until time to "lather" again.
   By the way, do not confuse waiting with idleness. Sitting around doing nothing is a dream killer. Read, study, take a course, keep your mind active with a hobby, and keep your eyes open for new opportunities.

What would you add to the list?  I would love to hear your feedback and comments.

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