Tuesday, May 06, 2008

THE STORM (a very personal blog)

Someone once observed that blogging can be very cathartic. I've never tried to test that idea, but ever so often, I have things on my mind and my heart that need to be expressed.

This picture was taken following a Celebration KREW meeting one Saturday night. The approaching storm clouds were interesting to watch, but we did not suspect what they packed. Less than ten minutes later, we were driving home in a surprising spring blizzard!

Sometimes, when the proverbial "storm clouds of life" arrive, we stand amazed from a safe distance. But before we know it, we are in the middle of the storm.

I have been wrestling with my feelings for some precious folks who are very dear to me. One of them is a relative, one a friend. Both are making unwise and spiritually disasterous choices in their lives. And I am absolutely powerless to do anything about it. Their issues are being dealt with at various levels. But that doesn't change the storm of emotions I'm facing.

I'm angry. I want to take them by the shoulders and give them a good shaking (especially the relative). Like Cher's character in Moonstruck, I want to slap them and shout, "Snap out of it!"

I'm depressed. Their actions and choices deeply sadden me. This part is actually surprising, because in the course of pastoral ministry, I have dealt with others with similar issues, but I've never been so down over it.

I'm taking it personally. "What could I have done? How could I have been a better friend? How could I have missed the warning signs?"

I'm resting in God's love and grace. This is the only stable part of this whole situation. My emotions may come and go, my reactions may at times be totally out of whack, but my Father is still there and still cares.

So please pray for my friend and for my relative, that they would wake up before it's too late. And pray for me that I may model what Jesus would have me model in the face of this storm.

Thank you.

1 comment:

  1. hang in there. DO speak the truth in love. as someone who disappointed friends and is back on track, i needed friends who would lovingly get in my face until the bondage of my sin could be broken. dont hold back. do it in love, but do it.